i cry EVERYtime

i cry EVERY single time i read this - 1 reason - it's the EXACT move i would do - to a "T"
*i got tears rolling down now*

is this not one of the MOST powerful pieces of art? - i can stare at this for hours/days and it will evoke so many different emotions! - i like to be connected to EVERY emotion i feel - good or bad - i wanna feel it in it's entirely! (it's the Buddhism in me)

(i'll get back to fashion/decor/cooking soon as possible)

Life Update
holy calamity - i told you yesterday i had a wake to go to and it was for a girlfriend i knew since i was 5 years old (we're not close, our circle of friends were friends, but we never clicked, but never any issue with us, we just never hung one on one) her Mom, who passed away suddenly in her sleep - i had my sh*t together walking in and waiting on the line (her hubby is the top county cop guy - so let's just say if you wanted to rob a house in the county there would of been no issue, b/c every cop was there) and THEN i finally hit the room and i saw the pictures of her, happy with her family - oh yes i started to choke up - i remember her like that, always happy, loven' the sun like me, ect) - THEN i saw Mrs. V laying there - i LOST IT - i mean literally people must of been like 'who is this girl, she's crying like it's her own Mom' - but THERE ya go - that's exactly what i thought - HOLY sh*t that will be my Mom next - and then all the questions of - OMG HOW, WHAT, WHO, WHERE, WHAT come rushing in - how do you go on?! - i mean really???

and as i told you i battled the lakes and ponds on Sunday (major rain in NJ/NY) to rush home b/c i KNEW something was wrong with my Mom (over phone conversation) - and sure enough - YUP she's taking a turn for the worse - UNIVERSE COME ON ALREADY, I MEAN REALLY, FOR REAL?! - i swear i think i might need to give this Universe of ours a lil kick in the ass or I'm gonna tell Mother Nature to come after it - something gotta change!

so today is the last day of my cleanse - tomorrow i can not wait to eat something SO yummy, fresh, and organic - i was suppose to have my photo shoot with Zillenia Designs today - but we moved our lunch to tomorrow and we'll run ideas then and do the shoot! -- i also got in touch with a former friend who worked for Escada for years - so i'm thinking the 3 of us gals can work up a business plan up and do something wild! - we all have such great business backgrounds and artistic minds that i know we would make an amazing company together *fingers crossed*

ok off to my long day - work; doctors; visit a friend; work; then hopefully HOME and early bedtime!

*huges and kisses to all my Butterflies for your support*

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  1. I bet that funeral was hard for you! Hang in there. xoxo

  2. That funeral sounds so hard, such a difficult time.

    xoxo ~ Courtney

  3. I have chills. That story totally rocked me to the core.

    Sorry the funeral was so tough for you honey. They totally suck and you're going through so much right now so your response is totally understandable. Hope that your lucky stars shine down on you right now and that things take a turn for the better. xoxo

  4. Wait, your mom made a turn for the worst? Is she okay now?

    And I'm sorry about the funeral. I cannot imagine the pain it is to be that close to something you fear so deeply.

  5. Not a good idea for me to have read this at work! Tears!

    I'm so sorry to hear about the funeral, I can't imagine what it must be like for you. You're one strong butterfly!

  6. Your mom continues to be in my prayers. You are such a strong lady, I hope you know that. The way you've chronicled your experience is very admirable. Sending ♥ your way.

  7. Sending hugs and lots of love!

    Such a powerful post. I shall keep you all in my prayers.

    X x

  8. OMG the first pic has such a powerful influence!

    hugs and kisses by Mani.

  9. Oh my god, that's heartbreaking. And a little cruel.

  10. Wow Erika..you have so much going...totally thinking about you and especially your mom! I cannot even imagine what going to this funeral was like for you. How are you doing through all of this?

  11. i love that piece of art...it is so poignant!

  12. Oh, that first quote/photo is disturbing and powerful. So sorry to hear you Mom is taking a turn for the worse. Wakes/funerals are so difficult because there is just so much raw pain in the room and it is beyond hard to see anyone suffering like that. You know I am here always if you ever need anyone to just listen. I will send you my cell again. xo

  13. I'm crying like a baby at work right now, that first quote KILLS me, so so so sad!


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